I hope nobody sabotaged Guetta’s Wikipedia page just to make me ask stupid questions. “Why did you kill them, David. Why?”
Interviewing David Guetta purely on the strength of his Wikipedia page. “So, David, you were born on the 7th November. Was that nice?”
The Cassetteboy Apprentice mashup has been taken down, and I’ve made myself furious imagining some IP-minded prick defending the decision.
Spies Like Us - gyroscope hairstyle joke. Top Secret - massive telephone scale joke. If you need any more help, just ask
Random House have commissioned a website called… The Lore of the Playground. Hmm. Hmm. HMMMM.
Bear Pride, London. Fat gay fashion with picnic rugs http://twitpic.com/5uykd
Two helicopters at once! THAT NEVER HAPPENS http://twitpic.com/5uqoz
It’s back! Its fun! http://twitpic.com/5srvz
Having just read Audacity’s official solution to recovering lost recordings, allow me to say “fuck you, Audicity, you free piece of shit”
This is the photo which I attempted to use to draw similaities between Tories and ET http://twitpic.com/5m8ya
Is there any word less thrilling or evocative than “forecourt”?
The Conservatives have done that thing that they did to Elliot’s house in ET! It’s happening again, but with Conservatives! http://twitp …
My first mask of the pandemic! Does it count if they’re Japanese? http://twitpic.com/5hz9t
RT @cretmeister: #eurovision Got to love ‘em. http://yfrog.com/5gbq5j I got one of that special guy too http://twitpic.com/5bfht
Those amazing #eurovision costumes http://twitpic.com/5be92
If one thing’ll convince the BNP we need every other nation living here right now, it’s this fucking awful song #eurovision #twumpet
It’s the Joan Simms-ulator #eurovision #twumpet
It’s half of shakespear’s sister, multiplied by six! I’d kill for The Mary Whitehouse Experience foghorn joke. I’d kill *everyone* for that
At this angle, it looks like she’s been tied up, and is trying to pick the lock with her fag holder http://twitpic.com/5a1u4
RT @samovarious: When drop caps attack: “Raped on a boat… I could get used to the glamorous and star-studded lifestyle” http://tr.im/lvKy
- @cretmeister Hey, cretmeister! You wanna go surfing? I don’t mean “catching a gnarly wave” - I’m talking about surfing… on the internet!
Bah. Pegg wanted “more time” to think about the answers, and’ll email me. If he’s fool enough to not go through a PR, he’s getting cock pics
I have to talk to Simon Pegg on the phone for 15 minutes about his favourite music. If he doesn’t fall in love with me, I’ll shit myself out
Excellent poster for “the world wide web”. Just reminding you it’s there. AND AWESOME http://twitpic.com/57gcb
Who wants to come and see a band called Honky sausage? Anyone? Honky Sausage? http://twitpic.com/56g61
Is there any version of Space Invaders where this could happen, or can I hate it and anyone in it http://twitpic.com/53qks
Well, that’s another Tuesday kicked in the prick. I can’t begin to explain how fundamentally I’m going to fuck Wednesday up.
These guns have really changed my attitude
Just watched an OCD rearrange the sandwiches in Marks. Once I’d figured out the pattern, it was all i could do to not help
I heard you came to fight me http://twitpic.com/4zi2a
Come to the Little Apple, Kennington’s odd provincial gay bar. Let’s FILL THIS MORGUE WITH ANAL http://bit.ly/poA1M http://twitpic.com/4v25n
Brilliant. A cunt is doing press-ups in the pub. Nice work, cunt http://twitpic.com/4so83
I would love to meet someone wearing this t-shirt. I think they’d have a lot to say. About… stuff. http://twitpic.com/4qh7z
#nuntipping Trying to organise a game of nun skittles, has anyone got a demolition crane and nine nuns they don’t want back, no timewasters
#crapnamesforpubs The Shit-Spattered Hag
To everyone who diagnosed a stroke, I just found some butter in my beard, so it’s way more likely to have been the toast in my nose option
I’ve smelt toast all the way from my front door to the tube. Either I smell of toast, there’s toast in my nose, or London’s delicious today
Alternate headline: Jennifer Aniston Throwing Awesome Non-Stop Party http://twitpic.com/4jcz6
City of Heroes Mission Architect = a lot of typing. I’d love it if there wasn’t a deadline, sunshine outside, and cachaca downstairs
RT @simonswatman: A four year old in my train carriage just said “I put a dick on your bum” to no one in particular.
Best logo, greatest name, and most inevitable disappointment with reality: Dry Cleaners Division Winner http://twitpic.com/4ec0w
If it’s wrong become turgid over 33 pencils you’ll never use, I don’t want to be right http://twitpic.com/4bzq2